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零点小说网 > 玄幻小说 > 每天回家都看到爱豆在作死 > 正文 053. 情侣吵架的正确姿势(1)

正文 053. 情侣吵架的正确姿势(1)(第3页/共3页)

sp; “boss,还有什么其他吩咐?”

“你能不能少下载点中老年表情包?还有,你的回复能不能多一些真诚,少一点套路,别那么官方,更别那么沙雕好不好?”

“额……刚才你也没对回复格式提什么硬性要求啊?”

明明开局就是个半命题嘛。

肖立早一听,语气里多了点儿埋怨跟委屈,“你这么回复,太过笼统了。别人一看,第一感觉就是你在敷衍了事。”

“我没跟他们提过豆沙包摄影师男友的事儿,所以面对不明真相的吃瓜群众,你更得展现一种让人信服的‘女友反应’懂不懂。”

“那你直接说该怎么回吧。”您吩咐,我照办。哪里不会点哪里,妈妈再也不用担心我的学习。

“你得……你得先在看似识大体的言辞下些微透露出一点儿不甘与怨气,我看情况适当的补充几句,然后你再突然间把所有的伤感一瞬爆发,用尖刻的但是又带着点儿……嗯,带着点儿撒娇的口吻……不依不饶的,油盐不进的,胡搅蛮缠的……骂我。半推半就方才哄好的那种。”

对,我就是想听你撒娇,我就是想看你吃醋。老子花钱冲过的,怎么滴?

江子木:喔~~~懂了,合着您老就是出钱找骂呗,这不是更容易了嘛?

“boss,问一句题外话哈,”江子木脑袋一歪,把手肘支在膝盖上,“您老是不是特别喜欢麦记?”

“嗳?”这是什么八竿子打不着的附加题?

“我估摸着,您老每次看到麦记门口那大大的金拱门形状,内心都是波涛汹涌超有归属感的吧?”

一个字母,蕴含了多少无法诉说的沧桑啊。

“咳咳咳,”肖立早琢磨了片刻,忙不迭翘着指头冲手机屏幕一个劲儿的点,“你个小屁孩,驾照都拿不到,还敢动不动开车?”

江子木耸耸肩,而后撇撇嘴,“是你嚷嚷着让我骂你的好不好。”

肖立早翻个白眼,平复下心情,苦口婆心,“我前面那段话的重点,是要‘体现女孩子的口不对心’,是要‘高段的使小性子’,是要‘杂糅n种情绪的抬杠’,不是直来直去的网路互殴,不是让你拼脏话词汇量,更不是……咳咳,咳咳,就这审题水平跟阅读理解能力,还天天自诩‘学霸’呢?”

“切~”江子木不太耐烦的扬了扬手,“你就直接说,想让我充满小女儿情态的跟你进行一场情侣吵架直播不就得了?”就这语言表达跟总结能力,还有脸怪我?

“对,对!就是这个意思!”现在的导演真的太难了,碰上先天条件差的演员,那是得口沫横飞的一遍遍讲戏啊。

“您老就是想要言情电视剧女主角那一款呗?”我说你多少也是个引领潮流的爱豆天王,能不能别总沉迷在“你是风儿我是沙”“车如流水马如龙”里?

“谁说那只是电视剧啦?我跟我哥们聊天的时候,人家连微信吵架截图都能当成恩爱秀。人家的女朋友们……”

“嗯?”

肖立早一听江子木一个结结实实的二声拉长疑问强调,反应极快,立马把声音转了个弯儿,“女朋友———们……的出场顺序不分先后,但绝对不是同时!”

“那些女孩子们,连吵架都是那么的……就是……娇俏的强词夺理,充满爱意的不合逻辑。”

江子木心里一咯噔,觉得要跟这已经塞在腰包里的小钱钱一别两宽了,嘴角一耷,心里暗暗嘀咕:呵呵,您老现在说的好听,真要碰上个这样的,您这暴脾气能撑过一周都算老天开眼!

江子木抿着嘴,沉默了足有半分钟,“boss,钱您老收好,这活儿难度太高,我实在干不了,您还是另请高明吧。”

肖立早:what?这活儿难在哪儿了啊亲?这妥妥是道送分题好不好?

“那个……我说神婆,你是没谈过恋爱呢,还是没在恋爱里吵过架呢?”这其实是一个问题的两种问法罢了——试想不吵架的恋爱,那还是恋爱吗?

这么一想,肖立早突然莫名开心了起来,隐隐觉得自己腰不酸了,背不疼了,连肚子都一点儿不饿了。

江子木看着屏幕里的肖立早神经兮兮的笑出了贝加尔湖的涟漪,后背一阵发寒,打个冷颤,一字一顿应道:“恋爱谈过,架没吵过。”

肖立早:哎哟,我的腰酸的像断了似的,我的腿疼的跟废了一样,顾妈,帮我叫救护车,要出人命啦~~~ 『加入书签,方便阅读』

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